Phenomenal Woman

T asked me to read this poem becuase I am going thru a hard month. I love, love, love this. So keeping it handy for the times I need to read this:

Phenomenal Woman
by Maya Angelou
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need for my care.
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Maya Angelou, “Phenomenal Woman” from And Still I Rise.

Lately, I have been thinking about doing a detox program. I think it is a nice way to kickstart my fitness regime. And what better day to "restart", "reboot" my daily shcedule and perhaps bring in a life-style change than my Birthday. I am inching closer to the "not-so-young-anymore" number. But I think you are as young as you feel you are. So, I want to feel more energetic, lively and vital. I think this might be a good place to start reading about detox and improving what I put in my mouth.
http://kimberlysnyder.net/

Second chances

I have been thinking a lot lately about second chances. Wondering whether friends are those who understand that sometimes you need a second chance. You make mistakes in relationships, but you learn a lot about yourself in the whole process. Once the clouds clear and you admit and accepts the mistakes, are "true friends" the ones who openly accept it and accept you and give you a second chance at the relationship.
And then, why is it so difficult for some people to give you a second chance?
Do they forget that when you unintentionally hurt someone close to you, someone you care about, then you hurt more than the person you hurt. And you feel like shit! And something that you did not know has just been revealed to you and you are willing to make amends. But to make changes you need a second chance. You need a chance to prove that you have learnt something more. You need a second chance to implement and execute what you have learnt. A person becomes wiser by making mistakes, by falling, and then by getting up and getting another shot.
And then sometimes, I think that you yourself need to give yourself a second chance. You need to forgive yourself and take another shot.
So, are friends the people who understand you more than you do and are willing to give you that second chance with an open heart. You sometimes hurt them, have fights, have arguments, but they are still ones who root for you the most when you get that so deserved second chance. They are the ones waiting for you at the victory line. They are ones who run into at the finish line and they catch your fall. They hug you, pick you up on their shoulders.
So, second chances are important, they are perhaps more important than the first shot itself. Second chances make us appreciate what the first shot and failures taught us, they re-iterate the importance of the first shot.
I hope that my friends and my life is generous enough to give me sceond chances. To give me a second chance to make relationships better, a second chance to know myself, a second chance to be a better and stronger friend.
To second chances!!!

Gems and such

I was reading some of the notes that I had made to myself in India during this India trip and there were gems that I read/heard that I had noted. I am putting them here so that I can read them whenever and whereever I think I need them.
This one is from Sorry Bhai. This is what Boman says to Shabana when she tries to come in the way of Chitrangada and Sharman's love. I think this is really powerful, a true test of strength and a true test of love.
"Real strength is when you love someone and you let that person have all the freedom that person needs; you let that person totally free and espite that, he or she remains yours."
The other one is from an episode of Mahabharat when Krishna is leaving Vrindavan to go to Mathura. All of Radha's friends are asking her why she does not stop Krishna. How can she love him and not be possessive about him. To that she says,
"Love is being able to recongise that when the reflection of the moon falls on the waters the lake, it is the foolishness of the lake to think that moon belongs to it. The moon is always and foreverr in its place in the sky shining upton the on the entire world and giving its moonbeams to everthing equally."
A little too contemplative, a little too cheesy sometimesat times. But there are times when one needs such words. These words become gems when they are set and said in the right settings and right circumstance. Until they are set and used and they shine, I am keeping these gems stashed in this treasure chest; for me to find them when I need them. Until then..they are for safe-keeping :-)

Doggy Door in Heaven

A friend and co-worker's dog passed away today morning. I had not met him, but had seen loads of pix. I know that had I met him, I would have instantly fallen in love. Dogs just talk to you with their eyes. The best kind of communication ever!
Neeways, I was thinking what to write to her so as to let her know how I feel and I found this wonderful website dedicated to dogs. Check it out!
Poems in Praise of Dogs

Here is what I sent her. I hope she finds the courage and strength she needs in this time of sorrow.

HEAVEN'S DOGGY-DOOR

My best friend closed his eyes last
night, As his head was in my hand.
The Doctors said he was in pain,
And it was hard for him to stand.

The thoughts that scurried through
my head, As I cradled him in my arms.
Were of his younger, puppy years,
And OH...his many charms.

Today, there was no gentle nudge
With an intense "I love you gaze",
Only a heart thats filled with tears
Remembering our joy filled days.

But an Angel just appeared to me,
And he said, "You should cry no more,
GOD also loves our canine friends,
HE's installed a 'doggy-door"!

--- Jan Cooper --- 1995

Love..a Why...

They say that love does not hurt; 

They say that love brings happiness

They say that love makes everything joyful

They say that love lights up the darkness

Then why does the heart ache

Why is there anger

Why are there disconnects

Why is there a fear of loss anticipated along the way

Why do two people grow apart

Why is there loss of words

Where does the happiness disappear

When does the boon become a curse

Why are there so many questions

And where do I find answers

Why does he say that something is missing

Even when I have laid down my heart; still he says it falters.

So do I still believe that love brings happiness

Believe that everything will be joyful like it was

That love will light our way 

That we met  has to have a divine cause.

- Leena

Jan 06, 2009; 1:27 AM

My Forecast...Can I ask for anything MORE??!!! I think NOOT!

Here is what my forecast says for the year 2009..very exciting...I will be ready for all the changes...

You are on the threshold of a major shift in your life as joyful Jupiter enters your sign next week to spend most of 2009 expanding your world. But you must be willing to change and to grow in order to make the most of whatever opportunities are offered. This can be challenging for you if you are reluctant to let go of the past. Don't hold on to what you have or you won't be able to grab on to what comes next.

Saving this for the time when I really need to read something to look upto.

Words, Words

I was talking to a close friend today. We have been really close and then suddenly like a snap things have changed. There is a growing distance that seems to be growing by the second. I was talking to this person that the dis-connect is very bothering and irritating. It is the very disturbing that when you think you have a real connection with someone and that connection suddenly has a lot of dropped calls. Neeways, I was trying to say this using words and more words and the person at the other end was not getting what I was trying to say..and now as I sit here writing this, I think, 'Are words really soooh important?". Yes, they help you express things, they help you "communicate", they are aids of connections, words are the building blocks of literature, they have been used so wonderfully and beautifully by poets, they are the bridges that connect sounds. But then again, there are so many things expressed by the body, by the eyes, by the lips; there is no much communication that happens without the use of a single word, there are some connections made instantly, w.o. even a "Hi"; and of course there is so much beauty captured in one picture that even a thousand page book cannot express.
So, now I am thinking the reason we are unable to communicate and connect today, is it really the fault of the words, or the fact that there really is a disconnect. When there is a connection, words are not needed and when there is a disconnect, all the words uttered are incorrect and inappropriate and inadequate.
But how do u tell a person, who you really care about, that there is a distance. How do you tell the person that there is a disconnect and hope that the connection gets turned back ON?? How do you relax when there is an obvious tension in the conversation?
I guess at such times, you just trust the cosmos and "SAY WHAT YOU NEED TO SAY". Just say it and hope that the older connection will aide the words. Well..hopefully!

I am back ....again!!

i am writing today after a long time... a lot of things have been going on in the past month. one thing I have come to realize is that if there is anything that i am not ( or my heart) is not sure about doing, I should just tell my mind to follow without any questions. I am not able to bring my mind to agree to anything that my heart is not really interested in doing.

Also, I really need to do something about this exhaustion i face. I am always exhausted all the time. I am exhasted from work, exhausted from dance, exhausted from cooking, exhausted from doing FAN work, JUST plain exhausted. I donot know what to do about the exhaustion. There is this feeling that I am being constantly forced into doing something that I donot want to do. But I still keep doing it becuase I have committed to it and now am accountable. I am really waiting for this week to be over soon, so that I can start to reprogram my schedule.

I want Wednesday, 1:30 pm to approach fast so that I can decide what I can do with my time and alos give more time to tasks that are more important to me.

Neeways...I have more to write..but will tomorrow.

Yesterday

Yesterday was a happy day for me. Those a little harder to come by these days with so many things going on. But today morning when I was thinking about everything I need to do this month and the next, about dance, FAN,Diwali, India Planning, I got this warm-fuzzy that everything was going to be alright and that everything will be handled appropriately.
So yesterday was a happy day. I wanted to tell G, but he was fast asleep before I got a chance to turn to him and tell him. But that's my G!! Love him no matter what!

Happy Happy Joy Joy!

New Blog

I started a new blog yesterday to record my thoughts, experiences and lessons about dance. Since dance is a part of me and my life, I think this was long time coming. I am feeling pretty good about it so far.
Here is where you can find my dance logs: Thumkas N Shimmies

What the F???

Well,
It happens to me often that I write something and then am too bored to read it, even proff-read it. I mean, heck, I just wrote it, pulled it from my grey cells and now I have torture the same grey cells to read and analyse the material they just produced AGAIN!!! How totally unfair.
BUTTTT, no proof-reading means, when I read my own posts some 2 months later, I sit there staring, thinking...WTF, how did I ever write that. I mean, did I just not use the "so" in the same sentence and there it is again....F****.
And then all I see are the glaring mistakes, that pop right up. Not the thoughts, not the "in-between-the-lines" stuff...Just the mistakes...HATE IT!!
So POA, will try to be good and read wateva I write..TRY, TRY, TRY.
Does that I have to read everything that preceeds this word...F**************K!!!

Law of Attraction-- oprah show.

I sprained my ankle yesterday evening while taking a walk, so am glued to the couch with an ice pack on my right ankle.
So, I am on TV therapy. I am watching Oprah. She is talking to a panel of life coaches talking about Law of Attraction. One of the ladies defined the law of attraction as "You exactly get what you want."
The universe will give you only what you exactly want; rather intend. The difference between a wish and an intent is that is wish is something that springs from a need. I wish I have a stringer husband becuase I want him to be able to pick me up. I wish I win a lottery because I want to buy a Beamer convertible. However, intent is something that comes from inner core of peace. Also, your body tells you the difference between a wish and intent. When you say what you want aloud, if it is something u really want, your feel physically stronger.
This is a very interesting thought. I think that I am watching this show because it is my intent to get out of this miserable situation. My inner core wants me to be really happy and so I am having this entire experience so that I can grow.
Another interesting statement: " The world is conspiring for my betterment."

Thing to take away: Make a vision board. Almost everyone on the show talked about making a vision board. A lot og ladies also had vision boards.
A vision board is something you make from what you want to vision for yourself. Express the visions using pictures, letters, printouts.

I am going to give it a try.
I am starting my vision board contents today.

More about the show as I watch. I am totally loving it so far.

Dancer's Performance List

Here is a list of things that Jaz created for us jewels. I am sure there will be things added to this ever-evolving-as-this-jewel-performs list. But a girl's gotta start somewhere. So here we go.
You fellow dance-bellas, please improvise :-)

1. Costume -- Important to check all the components of the costume.
2. Cover-Up. -- Don't want to give everyone a peak at the costume :-). Always SHOCK them!!
   
3. Props -- If dancing with one, check it the night before the performance. Pay attention to the condition and look if the prop has any details or decoration on it. This is crucial especially if you have been practicing with it. Props will often gather the signs of practice and rehearsals. When a jewel dances, the jewel mesmerizes the spectators with the spectacles of shimmies and mayas and never lets the imperfections of the prop distract from her glow .
4. Safety pins - I usually keep a compartmentalized box that contains all the safety pins in different sizes. makes pins easy to find in a hurry between costume changes.
   
5. Double-sided tape. A garment tape will also do as long as it can hold.
6. Needle and thread. Keep a white, black and one thread in the costume colour.
7. Bobby pins.
8. U-pins.
9. Stapler. for those times when safety pins fail.
   
10. Deodorant or Solid perfume....becuz you want to look and smell HOT, despite being hot and sweaty.
11. Tissues. Wet and dry.
12. Make up wipes
13. Spare elastic.
14. Diaper pins. This is for all you shimmie-llicous babes, to keep the belt from sliding down your booty.
15. Dental floss/ breath mints/ mouth freshener.
16. First aid kit -- Sprain Spray, Neosporin, Band-aid
17. Makeup -- Refer to things in the makeup kit.
18. Nail polish -- same colour as you are wearing. In case you dance your toes off.
    
19. Manicure corrector. If you have a small chip.
    
20. Spare shoes or sandals. To be prepared when you might be asked to mingle with the crowd
21. Water
22. A snack that can give instant energy. Something sugary like apricots and almonds. Preferably, nothing spicy or greasy.

That's all I have so far. Will keep adding as I learn more!

Shimmie on!!

Men from Mars.....??

Okay...so I am trying to keep up my self-made promise to write everyday (if possible :-) ). I have been thinking about how men seem to take advantage of their friends who are girls. So here you have a girl who wants a guy to talk to her, give her a man's perspective on life, just so that she can find her way through the completely confusing and puzzling world of MEN. And she gets is just another guy who wants to touch her every chance he gets, show his guy friends "look-who-is-my-friend". Is it really so difficult to be a friend? This is so confusing.
Well, so I am going to try another way of dealing with this. Keep the friend AWAY for some time and see what happens.
I have heard from a lot of fellow GFs that the IGNORE therapy works wonders. It has never worked for me so far, but this time I am prepared to give it a full try. I will try hard not to give into temptation to talk (which is SOOOO D%#$*#(#$*N hard).

I have been dancing a lot lately. I think it is really helping me deal with life and stress better, not to mention the added benefit of getting a chance to dress up and look HOOOOOT and then shake the booty :-D...FABOULICIOUS!!!

Just one of those days

I am jut having one of those days that starts off feeling great and wonderful, and then sometime around late afternoon ( around 4:30 pm) starts to feel like a total disaster. Donno if it is the gloomy, cloudy, absolutely-no-sunshine-at-all weather that has been resident here in Memphis since Monday, or just that I have so much that I have no energy left feeling. Neeways, no matter how tired I am, I still have to rehearse my dance for the upcoming show, and Ihave to cook and just HAVE HAVE HAVE to get my hair washed and conditioned.

Listening to "O Meri Jaan" from Manzil-Manzil. Everytime I listen to this song there is something new that I learn about this song and I fall in love with it again! Like today, it is the stuble modulations that Asha-di does with her voice. PRICELESS!!

I was looking and thinking about my blog activities and realized that I have a post-writing frequency of once-a-year....that SUCKS!! Especially when I have so much to say and write and also when everyone around me is telling me to write a lot. So, starting right NOW, I am going to make a sincere and religious effort to write a couple of lines about my life, dance, beauty, impulses, actions, joys and sorrow that every new 24 hours bring to me..

Here's to writing just enuf to have this blog filled, my mind emptied and avioiding carpel-tunnel.

Poem about MOI

This is what a co-worker, PAMish, had to say about me!! Although this might seem a little cheesy, I think it is quite sweet!!

happy / joyful / jubliant / rejoicing / wallowing / zippy Leena,
who will be remembered for desiging unflawed NAFTA,
se sikho kya hota hai Jeena...

Glossary::
NAFTA-- was a STUPID and VERY VERY largescale project we worked on.
wallowing -- We all know the obvious meaning of this word, but this is written with the alternate meaning in mind, as explained here :: http://www.answers.com/wallowing&r=67

Gulf Shores -- AWESOME WEEKEND--FIRST ANNIVERSARY

We celebrated our First anniversary in Orange Beach, AL. Here is the information....

This is gulf shores and orange beach:
http://www.gulfshores.com/
http://www.gulf-shores-alabama-condo-rentals.com/index.htm

Directions:
http://www.gulf-shores-alabama-condo-rentals.com/driving_directions.htm

However, the better directions are these:
Taking Hwy 45S and Foley Express Way.

The route off Hwy45 takes lesser time. Also since we both enjoy driving, we both loved this drive since in parts it goes through small towns. The only cons are that when the route enters Mobile, AL. in a part of the town that is not very safe; and if you really want to save time then you need to take Foley Express Way and pay $3 toll.

We stayed at this hotel:
http://www.islandhousehotel.com/

Other places for the rentals:
http://www.gulfshoresreservations.com/
http://www.kaiserrealty.com/rental.php
http://www.meyerre.com/?s_kwcid=meyer%20realty%20gulf%20shores|563730488
http://www.brett-robinson.com/?gclid=CJaCtqOd2YsCFQstWAodXHlvaw
http://www.bamabeach.com/

Also check this out -- Gives a live view of the beach:
http://www.bamabeachcams.com/LiveCams/IslandHouseCam.htm

Other things to do :

1. Sunset at Fort Morgan..SPECTACULAR...hope for a clear sky.
2. Trail on Bon Secour Nature Refuge. Take the 4 mile trail, It ends in a beach.
3. Water scooter
4. Dolphin cruises
5. Goto Pensacola, FL: Nice drive to Pensacola
6. Day Trips

Things to take:
http://www.gulf-shores-alabama-condo-rentals.com/beach-vacation-packing-list.html

1. Sunscreen
2. Things to play on the beach
3. Sun glasses
4. Swiming clothes
5. Sneakers
6. Club ware
7. HUNGER FOR FUN!!

Places to eat:

Gulf shores:

• Lulu's: Fish tacos,open air, Cajun Shrimp :Tel: 251-967-LULU
• Desoto's: Seafood platter, grouper,crab legs
• The Steamer: Shrimp
• Shrimp Basket: Shrimp, next to Sovenier city with the big shark mouth.
• Original Oyester House: Pinacolada, Fried oyester, shrimp, grilled seafood, crab cakes, key lime pie. Take a walk on alligator patio.
• Dippin' Dots ice-cream: Perrrfect after a long trail walk.
• Piny Pony: Patio on the beach, drinks, martini, view of the moon from the patio.
• Cheesecake at Hope's Cheesecake-- Have not eaten..heard it is really good. NOT a cheesecake FAN :(

Orange Beach:

• Flora/Bama- Club/gr8 drinks, DANCE and CROWD

Foley:

• Key lime milkshake at the Stacey Old Tyme Soda Fountain
• "Throwed Rolls" at Lambert's Cafe- This place has somevege options, The best part is that they throw hot rolls to you and you have catch them..FUN!! This is next to the big shopping mall.

Loxley, AL ( on hwy 45):

• Stop at Burris Farmer's market in Loxley and eat AWESOME strawberry shortcake, key lime pie. Best while driving back.

Other Favorites

Photos coming up........CANNOT WAIT TO GO BACK!!!
One of the best weekends we've had together....CHEERS TO ONE YEAR OF MARITAL BLISSS :-D

Spiderman..Spiderman...Good Spe-Eff and yet Boring..SPIDERMAN

Went and saw Spiderman-3 last Saturday. WHAT a BOOOOring script!! Apart from the wacky dancing of Mr. Toby and the sometimes interesting special effects, the movie seemed to be really inspired by some chewed-on Hindi movie script. Hero and heroine deeply in love, hero's best friend-turned nemesis, loves the heroine and wants revenge dur to "galatfaimi". So to take revenge, he tells the heroine "Agar HERO ki JAAN pyari hai toh usse bolo ke tum uss-se pyaar nahin karti". But just in the nick of time, the galatfaimi is cleared and in true "dosti ka imtehaan", the guy forgets about revenge and find newly-bloomed and stronger "dosti". Another villian aka. Sandman is nice-guy-turned-bad-boy saying, " Main accha insaan hoon jiski kismet kharaab hai"...Third villian is bad-boy-becomes-dangerous saying.."Yaad kar kutte tune mere saath kya kiya...Ab main tumhare saath wahi karronga". The hero forgives Sandman becuase of his "dukh-bhari kahani" and kills the real-bad-guy after the hero's best friend dies at his hands. Please translate this into American-English, and add some lectures about "achaa insaan" and there you have the script of Spiderman-3.

That brings me to my tri-rule: By the time a director makes the last movie of a triology, he is so tried and at loss of ideas that he probably looks for inspiration to mushy romantic movies or to fairy-tales or worse even to lectures about good morals and behaviour.
Example: 1. Matrix trilogy --First movie was WOW !! Second..SPECTACULAR!!! Third ...What was HE thinking ??
2. Rambo -- Not really a trilogy..but you see my point :-)

However, an Exception to the rule: Lord of the Rings. But I think that director already had a well-written, well-plotted script in the form of the book. Also, I would not really call the movies and trilogy...because they are essentially the same story.

That said, I am a FAN of "Pirates..." and the third movie is being released pretty soon. I would really like the "tri-rule" to be proved wrong....am really hoping for it.

OK..now the good things about Spiderman-3:
1. James Franco - Would like to see him in some well-scripted plot. Also would like to see if he can do any comedy. But he sure can act.
2. Toby Maguire dance - It was really entertaining..though HILLAROUS!!
3. Special Effects - I can see how this movie became the "most -expensive" movie so far

Would like to see Spiderman-1 or 2over 3 anytime. However, all that said...I am one of the those who has contributed to making the movie, number 1 for 2 weeks and to help it recover the expenses...Would LOOOVE to watch ANY Spiderman over some STUPID movies anytime..examples of stupid movies --disturbia, blades of glory, 300.